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Author Topic: Don't wanna!  (Read 1952 times)
unofficialsamurai
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« on: January 26, 2011, 02:21:40 PM »

Just wanted to see if I can get some advice on what do to when you lose the spark to practice? or on those days when you just don't want to do anything, especially dharma

Thanks!
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temugen
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« Reply #1 on: January 27, 2011, 08:48:30 AM »

You might try adding a physical approach to your meditations.
 Chi-kung, tai-chi, etc.
In some instances, the more aerobic you can become, the better.
Physical exertion can help clear entrenched mind sets.
As an example, Meditate on the dharma whilst performing the eight brocade of silk method of movement taught by bodhidharma . Thats a good beginner form that I’ve been trying to apply to my dilapidated body recently.
good luck. Smiley
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renounce all negation and strive with the total commitment of your being to become entirely affirmative of all life everywhere.
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D.Ogyen
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« Reply #2 on: January 27, 2011, 06:14:10 PM »

observe yourself not practicing.

I had the same question, and a good student said, ok, then eat the extra piece of chocolate and observe yourself.  Observe yourself. No matter what it is you are doing or not doing.   And you'll naturally come to any decision thoughtfully about yourself.  Observe yourself getting lazy.  I understood, this is a practice in mindfulness.  When you become aware of what causes the laziness, you get the solution to the problem on how not to buy into the habitual energies.   The path to learning: observe yourself.

So my only advice is what was given me, "Observe yourself not wanting to"  and then breathe.
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Joey
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« Reply #3 on: January 30, 2011, 08:44:26 AM »

first of all, what do you mean by Dharma practice?

hint: its not about doing prayers or reading Dharma books.
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If you propose to speak, always ask yourself, is it true, is it necessary, is it kind." ~Buddha
SharpPudding
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« Reply #4 on: January 30, 2011, 04:07:46 PM »

 If you have commitments then that's it, you just do it, at least the minimum.

 If you don't have a commitment, then take your pick of something you do want to do. A lot of the time, I don't want to read, so I listen instead, when I don't want to listen I read, when I don't want to do either I just keep the subjects in my mind.  When I don't want to listen, read, meditate, think, then I clean or find some way to benefit someone. So you can always find SOMETHING to further your practice that you feel like doing.

 I know what you're talking about, some days I don't want to do anything, so I offer just a single candle, recite my prayers really quick at the end of the day, I don't even sit in front of the shrine I sit at my computer, then I run off the minimum number of mantras, do  6 quick bows (not full prostrations) and go to bed lol. The longer you practice, the more sincerity,  the fewer days like that you have.  Also it helps if you don't entertain yourself, because lets face it, games, tv, or music give us such a high that it's hard to sit down on the cushion while going through entertainment withdrawals.
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WayBackHome83
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« Reply #5 on: January 31, 2011, 03:20:05 AM »

Hi Rafael,

My advice of what to do when you "lose the spark" to practice is to do nothing. Watch some TV, eat some food, hang out with friends somewhere - whatever; just go about your life for a few days. The Dharma will always be there.

I had the same problem once or twice. I didn't do any of my daily practices, didn't read the books, no mantras, no thinking about Dharma, nothing. I was tired and felt cynical and disheartened. In a sort of shocked awareness, I tried to meditate to see what the problem was, I tried contemplation - anything I could think of to get back on track.

But then I just let go. OK, so I'm tired of this. I can't be bothered - I've lost interest. I did nothing. And what I found was, I started to miss what I had been doing; things sort of felt empty and as a result, the spark that I had lost came back of its own accord and everything was good.

When you feel disinterested, don't worry so much. Just recognise whatever you're feeling, leave it where it is, go and do other things. You'll come back to it in no time at all.

Kind regards,
Sandy Smiley
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unofficialsamurai
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« Reply #6 on: January 31, 2011, 08:23:17 AM »

Thank you all for all your wisdom!
I know it will cone in handy

Bows

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D.Ogyen
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« Reply #7 on: January 31, 2011, 01:27:04 PM »

Hi Rafael,

My advice of what to do when you "lose the spark" to practice is to do nothing. Watch some TV, eat some food, hang out with friends somewhere - whatever; just go about your life for a few days. The Dharma will always be there.

I had the same problem once or twice. I didn't do any of my daily practices, didn't read the books, no mantras, no thinking about Dharma, nothing. I was tired and felt cynical and disheartened. In a sort of shocked awareness, I tried to meditate to see what the problem was, I tried contemplation - anything I could think of to get back on track.

But then I just let go. OK, so I'm tired of this. I can't be bothered - I've lost interest. I did nothing. And what I found was, I started to miss what I had been doing; things sort of felt empty and as a result, the spark that I had lost came back of its own accord and everything was good.

When you feel disinterested, don't worry so much. Just recognise whatever you're feeling, leave it where it is, go and do other things. You'll come back to it in no time at all.

Kind regards,
Sandy Smiley

To add to this, and echo this, I've had the exact same experience.  Which is why I said the same thing, just do what you do, just be with you.  SO DON'T do the usual, that's also breaking it up.  You just want to come into your life as a more joyful, happy experience at the ordinary level, you can't do that when stressing about your spirituality.

Sandy, you are wise.  That was a very kind reply. 

_/|\_
D. Ogyen
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WayBackHome83
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« Reply #8 on: January 31, 2011, 02:12:52 PM »

Ms Ogyen,

I liked your comment, "You just want to come into your life as a more joyful, happy experience at the ordinary level, you can't do that when stressing about your spirituality." This is very true. Sometimes people will advise "pray harder, meditate, push through, make offerings..." and so on. No doubt these things may help, but if one is disinterested in these very things, stressing and worrying about one's lack of motivation will hardly help at all. The harder one tries to hold onto suffering, the harder it is to let go Cheesy

People can be hard on themselves, expect too much achievement too quickly and feel dejected when nothing comes straight away. I think this is a main factor in feeling like you'd like to give up. A little give and take is necessary, I think. So today I have a difficulty, I let go. Tomorrow the difficulty goes away, feeling neglected, and everything returns with a new vibrancy.

As the Buddha said, a jug fills drop by drop. As Shakespeare said, all's well that ends well...if all is not well, the end is yet to come. Why should we worry? Shantideva was very wise in his words. I browsed the web site linked to your profile - it is very impressive and no doubt extremely useful to anyone who makes use of it.

Thank you for your kind words.

Kind regards,
Sandy Smiley
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wmw111
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« Reply #9 on: February 05, 2011, 02:38:13 AM »

This is something i'd like to think sometimes I employ many tactics coz my mind is very tricksy!.

Anyways if I ever think about giving up, then if my guru say he give up I must let him do so.

Sometimes there are emotions, thats come up very strongly, and you feel frustrated things just not going your way. It happened yesterday I think I just became more aware of how I felt. And after a while it was ok I felt like doing the dharma again. When we become aware of ourself, anger and frustration cannot stay on in the mind for long.

If we feel really bored and want to do something else, just recall we have DONE it all in countless existences. In Kechara we do push ourselves to grow and to do more, as when we push ourselves to care, like doing that extra bit for a person or animal, that person or animal suffers less.  Yes many times I feel tired my eyes are hurting me, and sometimes there is person trying to understand something do I push them away or push on!  If someone suffers less, there much more meaning in our existences.

 I do slip once in a while, but as Rinpoche say , if you fall down get up again DON'T stay down, don't stay in our pity party.
We can have pity party but make sure you don't stay for a long time, why coz it does you no benefit.

It is better to say you CAN than you say you cannot Smiley . Every morning I wake up I say I CAN. I feel thats Kechara's motto!.





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Joey
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« Reply #10 on: July 08, 2011, 05:04:28 AM »

Think about your own commitments, and what you will not achieve if you give up. If that doesnt scare you, look at the people in their 40s and 50s who have achieved nothing in their lives. Thats what really scares me. Really.
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If you propose to speak, always ask yourself, is it true, is it necessary, is it kind." ~Buddha
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