Correct course of action?

[gliang]

We all lead our varied lives and we may sometimes meet with  hypothetical scenarios frought with precariousness or some sort of uncertainty, and we are challenged to act on-the-spur. The basic question is : What is the best course of action to take?

If I am walking along the street and nearby, I see a blind guy crossing the road full of moving traffic. What do I do?

1) If I managed to save the blind guy's life as well as prevent an accident, buddhists might probably say to me "wow you're so compassionate. congrats!"

2) If I intervene out of my compassion to save the blind guy's life, and end up getting killed myself, buddhists might probably say "Oh dear, out of his compassion, he tried to do a good deed but got killed instead. He's got no wisdom!"
Or maybe, they might say "He has compassion for the blind guy but clearly no compassion for himself!"

3) If I decide not to do anything at all and the accident happens and the blind guy gets killed, I can also hide under an excuse and say "I practise compassion for others as well as myself! So how can I risk my life?!"

So what would be the correct course of action?

[spiritnoname]

 If we knew all the factors we could figure out what is best, but in life we rarely know all the factors.

 Since we don't know all the factors we would do best to make reasonable guesses about the situation and act to achieve the best outcome. This doesn't always give good results, but it's the best we can do. And after the situation has transpired and we have our results we learn from it and deal with any unskillful mental states that come up, like obsessive regret.

[pummy369]

Sometimes I do things (that I consider virtuous at the time) and later receive criticism for it.  It brings to mind the expression that no good deed goes unpunished.  It leaves me wondering if I should not have done it.

Sometimes I don't do things, even though I want to, maybe because I am afraid of the criticism and maybe because I really want to just do the right thing and not upset anybody and sometimes not upsetting anybody and not taking risks means - doing nothing.  So I sit back and watch and then later I realise that the correct decision would have been to just do it.

The only wisdom I have garnered so far from these observations of my interactions (expecially with the humans) is to be really clear about my motivation, to really check it - like I was checking a piece of dodgey fruit before biting into it.  I know my motivation is not to be trusted and needs such a thorough checking as it can change so quickly and can easily fool me.  On the surface it masquarades as one thing but underneath it is another. This is because my self-cherishing is still so strong.  Even watching my motivation gives me a good insight into my mind.  If it doesn't pass the test - best I sit down and shut up.

But this is only concerning small things.  A blind man crossing the street is a bigger thing.  Ooh - here's a story (which I may have told before which makes me think I am becoming my Nanna).  It's a bit off track so exit here if you don't have 5 minutes to waste....

My husband and I were in Cairo trying to cross the madest, busiest street we'd ever seen and although the locals were sailing straight across as if they knew the words to some secret protective street crossing charm, my husband and I were stood there on the curb for more than 10 minutes; we'd step one foot tentitively onto the street and retract it a moment later.  There was an old man lugging rubbish bins off in the distance, moving gradually in our direction and dragging one lame foot behind him.  As we weren't moving anywhere, he eventually hobbled over to us and stopped as we all three stood side by side.  He looked and smelled to somehow be soiled all over, as if he'd been rolling in the rubbish he was pulling along.  Without speaking and or hardly even lifting his face to us, he signalled us to follow him across the road.  We stuck close to him, like we were his children and as he too seemed to possess the secret protective street crossing charm, he guided us to safety.  Not stopping to receive a mispronounced thank you in our best Arabic, let alone a potential tip from two grateful Western travellers - with head down, he limped away. 

Maybe this little event doesn't seem like much of a miracle but you have to put it into the context of where we were.  Not to say anything bad about the Egytpian people but it was our experience that unless we were potetial customers, we were given a wide berth.  Any courtesies shown to us, were given with obvious expectation of renumeration - that's ok, it's often their bread and butter.  We were never treated poorly but we were definately avoided.  I put it down to the fear that people sometimes have of each other and different cultures; I was subconsciously scared of them too.  We had stood on that street for so long looking clearly terrified and twenty people in that same time must have dashed across before our eyes, seemingly unable to see us.   When that old man helped us across, we were suddenly visable to a hundred staring eyes, particularly those of the ever present Egyptian law and order.   I don't know what that may have meant for him afterwards but he was doing something which seemed to not be the cultural norm, at least in that particular neighbourhood.

I went after him later and gave him such a small amount of money (like $5 or something).  He kissed it, held it up to the sky and fervently praised Allah.

I don't know whether anyone rebuked him after we walked away, it is possible.   The point is,  he didn't care about the repercussions to himself and just acted out of basic human compassion.  If something had have happened to either of us while we were crossing the street, it could never have been his doing.  We were in more danger without him than we were with him.  His show of basic kindness touched us both and is still the best memory that we have of our travels in Egypt.  I wonder why it is the best memory...it seems to have left a strong imprint in our minds.  A/ we were so fearful and  B/ his small kindness to us was very powerful.  It also makes me think that those who are not able to rush around, have the time to notice things that others don't.

What does all this mean?  Hmmm....sometimes it's good to put yourself out there and take a risk, if your intention and motivation is good.

[spiritnoname]

 I wouldn't let all the foolish people in the world dictate my conduct by their praise or blame. It would be like taking advice on how to get in shape from a fat person, or how to be happy from a depressed person.

 That's happened to me before, I've been wanting to lose some weight and fat people come and tell me, oh, all you have to do is not eat after 7pm, drink vegetable juice, do a fast where you drink only maple syrup, pepper, and lemon juice, and I look at them like, "Oh, that's how you got so skinny?" I wouldn't advice telling them that though, because then they get mad at you lol.

[pummy369]

I understand Spirit but there is also some virtue in wanting others to be happy and if your good intentions are having the repercussions of making people unhappy - it can make you second guess yourself and the actions you are taking.   If you don't have the wisdom to know the absolute best action to take, you can only rely on your motivation.  At least that's all I've managed to come up with.

[spiritnoname]

 It is good to want everyone to be happy, but just doing what they want you to do is not always in everyone's best interest.

[gliang]

I understand Spirit but there is also some virtue in wanting others to be happy and if your good intentions are having the repercussions of making people unhappy - it can make you second guess yourself and the actions you are taking.   If you don't have the wisdom to know the absolute best action to take, you can only rely on your motivation.  At least that's all I've managed to come up with.

But the thing is, in acts of helping others for example, that in itself is a conditioned phenomena. If I give a beggar money, that act itself is conditioned. Because since everything is conditioned, it is subject to the 3 marks of existence; 1 of which is dukkha. So, wouldn't the good act cause suffering to the beggar?

My understanding is not deep enough obviously. Can someone elucidate pls? Thanks.

[wmw111]

Its conditioned if our motivation is not so pure , and not free of the eight worldly concerns.

So we do need to fake it first . I also could not be happy for others for a long time , cannot rejoice for people to have nice things , good things always I want to be No 1.

But as you keep trying to maintain good motivation and keep doing it it will change ... not very fast but it will.

Does that address your questions?

Would it cause suffering to the beggar hard to say till u do it.

[spiritnoname]

 Everyone starts practicing with unpure motivations. When you're burning brush and weeds what you are trying to get rid of is the fuel. The craving for happiness is the fuel to burn away craving, by itself craving is not enough, but it's not something you just throw away, not until after you've ended the cycle of birth.

 If you just tell yourself not to want happiness you're not gonna get very far.

[greasypalm]

The old adage - "practice makes perfect" is a good one to follow.
Of course in every action we do we have to live with consequences but like WMW said, generating good motivations helps.
Once you are at ease with your practice, you will find the wisdom to deal with life's many difficult situations (your mind will become alert).
 

[Joey]

We all lead our varied lives and we may sometimes meet with  hypothetical scenarios frought with precariousness or some sort of uncertainty, and we are challenged to act on-the-spur. The basic question is : What is the best course of action to take?

If I am walking along the street and nearby, I see a blind guy crossing the road full of moving traffic. What do I do?

1) If I managed to save the blind guy's life as well as prevent an accident, buddhists might probably say to me "wow you're so compassionate. congrats!"

2) If I intervene out of my compassion to save the blind guy's life, and end up getting killed myself, buddhists might probably say "Oh dear, out of his compassion, he tried to do a good deed but got killed instead. He's got no wisdom!"
Or maybe, they might say "He has compassion for the blind guy but clearly no compassion for himself!"

3) If I decide not to do anything at all and the accident happens and the blind guy gets killed, I can also hide under an excuse and say "I practise compassion for others as well as myself! So how can I risk my life?!"

So what would be the correct course of action?

why would you wanna care bout what people think when you help someone? as long as that person benefits.......

shows that you helped that person so that you could gain fame...

[wmw111]

Joey, can we be a little tactful !

[Joey]

Joey, can we be a little tactful !

is being straightforward a crime? =( if everyone was tactful then whats the point of even studying the Dharma because reality is less tactful.

[wmw111]

there is this thing called skill : )

[spiritnoname]

 I like straightforwardness, but a lot of people don't haha